Friday, January 6, 2012

My Big Little Home

I like to think we live big lives in a small space.
Our apartment is very teensy.
With just one living space and a galley kitchen, its so easy to feel 'over crowded.'

My mood with my little home swings back and forth constantly. Sometimes I feel like I have the coziest little cottage house that I adore, and the next second I feel like if I trip over one more basket, or one more big man boot, I'm gonna lose it!

Our home really is lovely, I think that sometimes during my blog crawl, when I see couples with beautifully decorated homes, and lots of space for intimate little areas, that green eyed monster of jealousy can get me; and suddenly my little home looks a little too little.
With Jeremie in school right now, working like a champ at attaining his second career, we're, by neccessity.
I joined what I thought was a project: "Have a No-Spend Month", and chuckled with the realization that every month for us has to be a "no-spend month."

I look at these lovely tours of peoples homes, and I see their office, dining room, living area, all artfully arranged, and I get a little embaressed that to encompass all that in our home, would be one picture of one room.
However, I know that no matter where one lives there will always be issues or problems with your home. There will be parts of it you don't enjoy or wish were a tad better.
You could live in the most beautiful of homes with the most beautiful furniture and still be discontent.

Contentment has to rely on more than just material possessions. It's so easy to fall into the 'if I just had ________, I'd be content' trap.
I'm sure we've all done it.
It's changing your thinking from "if I just had" to "look what I have!"
And we've been blessed with so much.

As a homemaker my desire is to make a "home." So I naturally want to make my home as comfortable and beautiful as possible, and sometimes I think that means I need new curtains or better furniture, but a home is made when love dwells there.
No matter what you have, any dwelling can be a home.

Before we moved back home, Jeremie and I rented a house.
It was large, had tons of room and nice yards; but it did not become a home.
I wanted to be near family, and living such a long distance away had become stressful on me, and so, I put absolutely no effort into making it a home.
It was comfy, and well furnished, but it never was more than 'just a place where we lived.' because I didn't want to be there.
Whereas Jeremie and my first ever apartment as a married couple was a real dive. It was sub-level, dark, had orange shag carpeting, and an unfinished bathroom with a cement floor and drywall walls; yet somehow, it became a home for us and I loved it.

I've seen first hand how the building does not a home make.
So I willingly choose to love my little space, that fits my little family and thank God for it everyday.



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